A Change in Seasons

I would be re missed if nothing made it onto the blog during this part of the journey.  It's probably one of the top five favorite seasons in life thus far, might even make it to the number one spot by October.  I think you would understand and agree considering the exciting news of engagement!  That's right, this Garza girl is engaged!  After 29 years, and many ups and downs and turn arounds, that annoying question of who I will spend the rest of my life with has been answered - It's Michael!

To describe this season, of course, a hot cup of coffee, brisk breeze from the window and warm haze of a candle are all involved in setting the mood.  It has been joy filled and a gift of time to have spent these last few months with family as the details come together.  Due to the fairly unpredictable nature of our jobs, and of course our strong desire to begin life together, Michael and I have decided to plan a wedding within four months.  Just in time to enjoy the fall and drink many pumpkin spice lattes while watching the leaves change colors.  There is a ridiculous amount of symbolism in the changing seasons and so it is fitting that we get to tie the knot (as they say) as the seasons rapidly change here in the mid west.

Today, my sister and I went for our first dress fitting and it was super fun to feel like a princess. This week we will be selecting the music and working on a guest book.  I will save you from the boredom of listing all the other wedding details that must take place; please rest assured they will be completed in time. T Minus 45 days away.

Aside from all of the wedding details, Lisie and I have spent many days together training for the Chicago Marathon.  It has been difficult to keep up the pace as the miles continue to increase, we are up to run a 16 mile run this weekend.  In case you are wondering, it is not a walk in the park.  It's over two hours of sweaty effort as my achy knees pound the pavement reminding me that 30 is around the corner.  Podcasts have been a saving grace.

Here are some of our engagement photos.

Love,

Alison

Hail on the window pains

A short reflective post

It's Saturday night here in Chicago, tomorrow we will celebrate fathers day and I look forward to time with family.  The last seven months have been - stretching.  Shortly after the last post I returned to the middle east and was immersed into long working days with no weekends off; we were responding to an emergency of mass displacement caused by war.  My immediate role included keeping track of all the items we distributed and activities we accomplished each day - where, when, and exact location.  Eventually our team decided to open an emergency field hospital near the front lines of war, and so the team was hard at work with planning.  Writing it all here seems daunting.

Tonight I logged back into this account after so long, and saw a draft that I began to write in March.  It was a stormy night, and I was feeling quite lowly.  My mind was tired from work and my days were surrounded with news on the war, on death, on suffering, on injustice and senseless daily killings.  The emergency was constant and it felt almost unreal at times.  I knew that people reading the news in distant lands could click a button, flip a switch, and forget it just like that.  Yet, for the families that I saw lined up to receiver their monthly food rations, or for the children I saw laying in the hospital bed with bandaged wounds - purely from weapons meant to kill - for them, and for us - it was a reality.  Somedays, like that day, it stared you in the face, unforgiving.  The disparity seemed to laugh in my face.  Below is the draft of the post from that day in March.  Hopefully providing a glimpse of the last few months and the reality that people are facing even still today.

- March Post - 

I can hear the hail coming down on the window pains and see the lightening bolts strike.  Thunderstorm.  Not too long ago I also heard the sound of fighter jets flying overhead, were they flying to or from the war in Mosul?  Are the children ok? 

I used to love the rain.  I used to squirm with excitement and run outside with my sister to try and see how long we could play with the lightening and thunder.  The constant pour of water was refreshing and in those days, seemed like they brought healing and life.  Now, rain often causes tears to well up in my eyes.  The thunder reminds me, as it reverberates in my heart, of the pain that families are facing not too far down the road from where I am now.

just down the road, are families sitting in their tents, freezing from the rain, trying to keep things dry.  Just down the road are people like you and me - filled with a sense of hopelessness by a war they can not control.  Just down the road, they sit, waiting, stuck, uncertain of the coming days.  And that rain that once brought me joy in a different season, now brings me a bit of their pain.  I will never know or understand what it feels like to be displaced from my home.  I will never fully feel their pain of loss from family members killed, raped, or brainwashed and it seems cruel to even write about it as if I do understand it, because I don't, and I won't. 

This broken world is still not yet fully healed, and there is a lot of work left to do.  Somedays I wish I could ignore it and live a normal life, with no pain or constant reminder of injustice and violence.  Yet - God is gracious and kind, and forgiving, and gently reminds me...

Pause - End Post

Hoping to post more now that I am home.  Especially hoping to finish my thought sand not leave them hanging for three months like that ... sentence above.  Grandpa - thank you for reading!  I love you!

Alison